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Chris

Funny Quotes

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What are your favourite funny quotes you've heard in the game, there are loads of ped comments and stuff that CJ says.

A good one is the second time CJ says "Does the Pope shit in the woods?

and Cesar replies with "I don't know holmes, why do you keep asking me that?What the pope does is his business"

lol :lol:

Also on Radio X, Sage says:

"Sage, thats my real name, if you dont believe me you can go fuck yourself" :yup:

Oh and a comment from a ped on CJ's hygeine problem:

"Do you shower in shit"

:lolbounce:

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sup im new here, but i would have to say the funniest one ive ever heard was some guy asks "Do you shower and doodoo?" lol ;)

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During the end mission where you have to take over two Idlewood territories, I gathered up a gang of about seven OGFs, plus CJ and Sweet, and walked them to Idlewood (I figured it'd be easier than trying to drive that many there). On the way, we crossed an intersection where some car screeched to a halt by us, and the driver said "You're like my a$$hole: always holding S**t up!" I was laughing so hard, I got killed in Idlewood.

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My favorite is when you go up to a ho, and reply negitavly, he says many funny things. My favorite is: "I would, but I have some self respect."

I also like when Sage says something like "OK, it's time to chop some heads-we're gonna start with that bitch from the record store."

KDST Radiohead

"If the cops can't catch you, you must be on... THE DUST"

Fear it? Do it commercial:

"I was having these REALLY HORRIFIC thoughts. I wanted to sleep with my mom. Now that I have, I don't want to anymore."

And... last but not least, some commercial:

"Mom, Tim broke the vodka bottle on your night stand! ...Chris did it! ...You little ####s, I'll kill you both!

Edited by chris82

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when you try and hook up with the girlfriend that likes fat guys, she rejects you(if you've got full muscle) and says ' what did you have for breakfast? steroids? ' :lolbounce:

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i heard a ped say

hey did you see those body bags up north

(Second Ped)holly shi :!: i think i just took one

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Some country girl: You sure have big muscles.

Carl Johnson: Thanks, I look good. But I'm an asshole.

And...

Hobo: When I find that Chihuahua I'll kill it.

That slaps me on the knee.

Edited by TUN3R

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"Smoking kills, unless you kill first." "It's time to smoke the smokers."

"It's a revolution out there and frankly it's time to start chopping off some heads. I'd rather be dead than ignorant. Learn

from me. I know what I'm talking about."

-Sage

"It ain't work'n, beat it with a wrench."

- Random GTA: SA voice

"Ain't this what they mean by car pool?"

- CJ while car jacking in the rain

"Now I got to steal another car."

- The guy who just got car jacked

"Can't you see I'm busy be'n high!?"

- Some guy after bumping into him

"I realized after my third child I hate kids!"

-Radio comercial

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* (After playing Freebird)

"That's the song I listened to when I went to put my wife down. I'm kidding, she survived."

* (Something about telling Sage to get over herself and stop whinning)

- KDST DJ

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IDK If you guys only want GTASA Quotes in here but on GTAIV TBoGT theres a mission where when you walk into Maisonette 9 you incounter a hot chick and the game skips to a cutscene of Luis banging her. Luis says, "Say my name," The babe goes, 'I dont know your name but this sure feels good," I laughed my Assasins creed off.

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Cj crashes into car and says "I've seen alot of idiots in my time, but you special"

The EMS guys sometimes fight you, one says "I am going to split you cranium plates" (something like that been awhile since I got into fight with one)

LS cop has tourettes He say something soft like "I've had a really bad day mister, (then shouts) I HOPE YOU DIE - "You haha you think your tough" "IVE BEEN SOBER FOR OVER A YEAR" wreck his cruiser. "go head just test me I clean" "ah this will and points to my license"

LSPD "I wont shoot int he leg dickhead" "shoot him in the ear" "aim for the crotch always" "dont let me die in my moms basement"

Motorcycle cops quotes

"How would you like my badge for a but plug"

"Show you how its done on the east coast no witnesses"

"Thats for screwing my wife" "mess with a mans wife will you" " out of the way Im trying to kill my ex"

"Looks like someone is going to collect life insurance douche"

Most of the ped quotes have been already been covered

IDK If you guys only want GTASA Quotes in here but on GTAIV TBoGT theres a mission where when you walk into Maisonette 9 you incounter a hot chick and the game skips to a cutscene of Luis banging her. Luis says, "Say my name," The babe goes, 'I dont know your name but this sure feels good," I laughed my Assasins creed off.

that is a good one

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