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#41 Sherman

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 04:23 PM

Talk to her about it, I think still would be the best option. This will be more awkward than anything, but if she's a best friend then.... yeah.

#42 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 04:38 PM

Like I said earlier, direct & honest. If the friendship is solid she'll appreciate that & if not, than at least you know where you stand as friends.

Gycu - You've never really pissed off a woman before, have you? Although plan C does have it's merits....

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#43 Sherman

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 09:59 PM

Fear of taking things too fast -- good or bad? I think it's good to have it in the back of your mind not to, but then you constantly thing "should or shouldn't I" If you arn't fearing, you might really take them fast, and end up freaking the other person out. But you won't constantly be thinking about it....


Am I right? About the second part, I mean... the first part is me >.>

#44 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 10:14 PM

A little fear is good, helps avoid some of the headaches, like getting serious w/ someone & finding out they're a psycho.

Too much you overthink things & take the fun out of it, miss something good because you spent too much time worrying
about "what if?".

If I could get this sorted, I'be rich enough to buy a shuttle & send Jack thompson & Hillary Clinton back to Uranus or wherever they come from.

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#45 Sherman

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 10:16 PM

Heh, yeah. I'm sort of woried I'm gonna end up goin' too fast, I just need to chill.... kind of hard when it's the first chick you've tried to talk to that talks back to you in a long time.

#46 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 10:18 PM

Good luck, hope it works out. Gotta run, later.

Later on I'll get Mama Kitty (mine) on this, don't have time now but she has a great take on this.

Edited by Urbanoutlaw, 09 June 2007 - 10:21 PM.

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#47 Sherman

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 11:15 PM

Thanks, heh. Who's mama kitten? You're wife/girlfriend I'm presuming?

#48 MrLlamaLlama

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Posted 09 June 2007 - 11:48 PM

'Mama kitten'... ooohh, kinky. But whatever you're in to... I won't tell anyone... :whistle: ...promise...

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#49 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 12:34 AM

Mama KittY - that would be the misses Outlaw, from the gun show. And you could only imagian....

Talking earlier about fear & she started quoting baby related things & their prices. We're now raising a 2-year-old
grandson :evil: (long story I'll go into some other time). If I had my way the kid's name would be Harley, that's the direction I was thinking when he popped-up. :bashhead:

Edited by Urbanoutlaw, 10 June 2007 - 12:34 AM.

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#50 Sherman

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 12:54 AM

We were talking about being fear of going to fast?? Not getting into her pants or anything, haha. I'm confused >.>

#51 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 01:11 AM

Just the way she said it was funny. But careful, that sneaks up on you too.

EDIT: GF issues are usually confusing by nature.

Edited by Urbanoutlaw, 10 June 2007 - 01:12 AM.

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#52 Sherman

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 01:19 AM

Yeah, I'm not gonna befast to do that. I think she's 14 though.. apparently she's in Drivers ed.. so.. 14.5 or barely 15.... meh. I'm almost 16.. no worries. One year is nothing. Plus I wouldn't've guessed, so yeah.. no worries. I'm still wondering how old you are :P And I don't mean 98, haha.

#53 Gycu

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 09:34 AM

Gycu - You've never really pissed off a woman before, have you? Although plan C does have it's merits....


Nope...Because I`m not really a female magnet ... I`m not a kool guy ...

Edited by Gycu, 10 June 2007 - 09:35 AM.

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#54 MrLlamaLlama

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 10:19 AM

Yeah, I'm not gonna befast to do that. I think she's 14 though.. apparently she's in Drivers ed.. so.. 14.5 or barely 15.... meh. I'm almost 16.. no worries. One year is nothing. Plus I wouldn't've guessed, so yeah.. no worries. I'm still wondering how old you are :P And I don't mean 98, haha.

My GF is like a year and 3 mths younger than me.. Which kinsda sucks for 3 months of the year, cos atm i'm 16, and she's 14, and some people (maybe even you) might think that's pretty fucked up. It'll be alot better when she's 15 though, that don't really seem so bad.
QUESTION TIME: How much older is too juch older?
Do you think there's a limit to the age difference between you and your partner?
Discuss.



And gycu. You'll find someone.Someday. Promise :thumbsup:

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#55 YellowJacket

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 01:42 PM

I love the age question so I'll answer that first and then I'll answer the general girl thing.


Age is nothing but a number, in MOST cases. I can see a bit of a problem when one person is 60 and the other is 13 but we aren't all pedos.

A lot of people think that a relationship with an age difference wont work because of different interests, etc. and the people that say that are the ones that couldn't choose a partner properly. My husband is 12 years older than I am. My parents are 10 years apart and his parents are 20 years apart. Granted, my parents got divorced because my dad used to be a drinker but it had nothing to do with age, my husbands parents are still together after decades and my husband and I are hitting 5 years in January. He acts like I do and likes the same things I do. Age never was an issue and it means nothing. A relationship works because of the people involved, not because of what age they are. That's why people like Catherine Zeta-Jones and Micheal Douglas are still together after a long time and these stupid young couples close in age aren't. They make it work. They get the stupid age thing brought up but they don't care and they show that age really is just a number and things work out because they make it work themselves. Final though: age is nothing but a number and it has no effect on your relationship because if you really love each other, you both compromise to make the relationship work.

Next, from reading quickly most of the posts here, it seems that a lot of you have the question of whether you should go tell a girl your feelings and ask her out.

You can't make a person like you and go out with you. It's a hard thing too when the girl is your friend because if you tell her your true feelings, it might ruin your friendship. My advice to hang out, see what the girl likes doing and hold back your feelings for a while. The bottom line is, BE HONEST AND STRAIGHT UP WITH HER. If she is really your friend, she wont let your feelings ruin your friendship. Just don't go all out and tell her you want to screw her and shit. Just throw out hints at first. Tell her she is an amazing girl, she's fun, she's cool, anything that sort of hints that you like her but doesn't come straight out yet. If she picks up the signals, go for it. Just sit down with her one day and tell her you hope it doesn't ruin the friendship but you have feelings for her and wonder if she has feelings for you. Just make sure you make her feel comfortable. Tell her you wont get hurt, regardless of what her feelings are for you. You don't want to make her feel pressured. If she tells you she is interested in you, don't go all out and think you are BF/GF right away. Tell her you want to date for a while and see what happens before making that decision of whether you really want her as a GF. People could be different, you just have to date for a while to REALLY get to know them and the way they are. If she turns you down, just tell her that she is a very special friend and her decision wont ruin the friendship and let her know you want her as a friend still.

Basically, it's a catch 22. If you tell her your feelings, she might feel the same way. On the other hand, she might be one of those retarded girls who gets offended and upset (seriously, what kind of girl DOESN'T want guys to like her? I'll never understand why they get upset about it) but if that happens, she really wasn't much of a friend in the first place.

Be honest, don't sugercoat things and go for it. If it was meant to be, it will happen. If it wasn't, you just hold your head high and move on to better things. The key is to be patient. You might like a girl this week but next week your feelings might fade. Don't rush and don't feel bad if it doesn't go your way. It will hurt in the beginning but you'll get over it. There is someone for everyone.

Edited by Jade, 10 June 2007 - 01:42 PM.

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#56 Sherman

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 04:44 PM

With age.. it depends. 14 and 16 isn't too bad (That's like a Freshman and Junior dating.. don't know where you're from though) but if you're a Senior and screwing 12 year olds, then yeah... I think that's a problem.

We kind of have this 'stupid love' thing in my family. Anyone who married someone rather older, didn't go over so well. Got beat, bad relationship (partner was a druggy or something) or just didn't like them after a few years. But yeah, my family is seriously messed up, so they're nothing to go by.

((Just a disclaimer, I don't want to get flamed because someone mistook it.... stupid love as in just went with them "just cause" or money or nice cars, promised a better life, etc.)

#57 MrLlamaLlama

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 04:56 PM

Thanks Jade, nice contribution.... And good advice.
And skyline, i'm from UK, the sytem as it stands here, is i'm in 'year 11' of school, and she's in 'year 10'. But school starts at 'year 4' here...wtf?
But yeah, neither of us seem to think it's a problem at all, shame her sister does (she's the same age as me, a little older i think).. so yeah, thanks all, the age questionmis a biggie, but you both sispelled my former worries, whick weren't too big anyway... I won't us the 'L' word, because according to skline, it eats kitties in your sleep, or whatever he said.. lol

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#58 Bear

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 04:58 PM

An old friend of mine is 17 and is dating a 28 year old man off the internet, I found that quite creepy espically as this 28 year old had groomed a friend of mine at 16 for sex off the internet. That is when I think big age gaps just dont work and are wrong.

My aunt and uncle however have a 20 year age difference and they are so happy and have been married for about 20 years.

So I think it all depends on the situation.

Jade is right about the gril problems, being honest is the best but just dont jump on her or anything or profress your love, obbessesion and stalkers are not appalling for a girl.

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#59 Sherman

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 05:03 PM

@Llamma: Yeah, she's probably just a tad worried with you being the same age as her, just protective over her sister.

I won't us the 'L' word, because according to skyline, it eats kitties in your sleep, or whatever he said.. lol


Unless you're positive when you say it.... you don't. The ninjas will eat your kitties and pirates will steal your house.



edit: And on me... things are going quite well ^_^

#60 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 10 June 2007 - 05:27 PM

MrLlamaLlama - Or she has feelings for you herself. (just hardcore'n you)

Jade - Full Point! Could not have said it better myself. It also helps to get the point of view from the other end of this,
make it easier to avoid hurt feelings.

The age thing, depends on your age. MrLlamaLlama should be fine as she's within a couple of years of you. If she were 9,
that would be different. Just save the grown-up stuff (& all the headaches that go with it)for when you're older & enjoy being kids. When you're older & get some life experience it becomes a matter of who makes you happy. One of my best friends married a woman almost old enough to be his mother, & we joke about her being his second Mommy, but the marriage works & they're both happy.

28 year old internet guy & senior who wants to date my 12 year old - These guys haven't seen my topic "Show us your guns".

SkyliNe - I've also eluded photography to date. :evil:

Edited by Urbanoutlaw, 10 June 2007 - 05:30 PM.

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If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's meant to be.

If not, point & laugh when it flies into a woodchipper.





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