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#401 draftermatt

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 06:26 PM

Well im not going to create a male version of this topic so ill just post this here.


My personal advice is to kick him to the curb. If he's paying more attention to the computer than to you what is in the relationship for you?

Especially now that you want to confide in him/talk to him.

Is it possible that he's cheating on you? You'll often see people getting very distant when they're cheating.

Being together 3+ years I understand that it can be hard to leave, to start over, what have you. But clearly he's not there for you anymore. Plus according to your profile page you're 17. I'm not going to say "that's too young to have a serious relationship" my wife & I started dating when we were 16, and have been together almost 8 years now, married for 2. But it's not like you'll have to worry about being alone forever.

Personally I don't care if you're 65, if you're not happy get out. What's the point of staying with someone if you're not happy.

At least sit him down, face to face and say "listen or it's over" then pour your heart out. If he's still bull shitting you then get out of the relationship before it gets worse.
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#402 Chris

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 06:50 PM

^ That's some good advice.

We seem to have quite a few members here with some sort of anxiety disorder. Anyone want to make a topic for it? If you guys/girls want anyway. I'm sure we discussed it somewhere before in some social group topic and it was like half the people who replied at least claimed they had some disorder. So I think a topic wouldn't go unused...

#403 Urbanoutlaw

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Posted 01 September 2008 - 07:06 PM

Agreed w/ draftermatt, the guy needs to make a decision as to what his priorities are & if he can't make his GF one of
them then it's time to move on. Admittedly I'm a bit of a video game junkie, but there's a pause button & it's no effort
to acknowledge someone coming into the room. There's also the final option, the "OFF" button (it's just a game).

Have the talk, maybe he's just a little thick & doesn't realize he's hurting you.

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#404 guilty.by.association

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 12:29 AM

I had a talk to him, he's sorry and trying to help me.

And no he's not cheating on me, he's not that kind of guy, plus he doesn't even converse with other chicks lol.

I think things will work out, he's just really into his gaming and his close group of guy mates. They're all like that.

I'm going to give things a go and see how things are for a while then re-assess the situation. We have been together since we were 13 and we've been through so much together.

I would literally saw off my leg to save the relationship.

Thanks for the advice guys, really appreciate it.

The anxiety disorder thread sounds like a good idea. A place to get shit out. I wouldn't wish that kind of disorder on anyone, it has literally ruined my life for the past year. I'll start it now.
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#405 draftermatt

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 01:55 PM

I'm glad you spoke to him, and that you're trying to work on things with him.

And I didn't mean to make construe "he's cheating" if you took it that way. I just know that some people get more attentive because they feel guilty, while others get distant because they feel guilty "cheating" on their lover with their SO (odd, but it's out there). Or because they want out but can't do it themselves so they treat their SO like dirt so they'll break it off.
I'm older than most of you. Shut the hell up and get off my lawn.

#406 guilty.by.association

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Posted 02 September 2008 - 11:33 PM

Yeah, nah it's the last thing he'd do. To be completely honest i know he's liked other people in the past, a couple of other people he knew. Nothing serious just a crush kind of thing. We were really rocky at the time and he made the decision to stay with me instead of breaking it off and going after other people. I have left him in the past, and he never decided to date other people. It's been me that's hurt him.

We will get through it, it just sucks that fate has thrown all these problems in at a really bad time.
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#407 Nate10

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Posted 19 December 2008 - 05:10 AM

Edited due to embarrassment.

Edited by Nate10, 12 May 2009 - 02:35 AM.


#408 Sherman

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Posted 19 December 2008 - 05:18 AM

I wouldn't bother with thinking of breaking them up, things happen, I know you're better than a lot of guys out there, kind of like me. You aren't there for the poon or anything, you're there to be you. Just hang out with her and see where it goes, but with this advice. Be prepared for a fight or hatred from the BF.. sometimes.

#409 GTA Don

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Posted 19 December 2008 - 08:52 PM

Eh, so I'm pretty much over Devan. Which is good news, considering she lives 6 hours away and has been over me for quite the time. Half a year I think.
But hey! Girls and me never work so here's the newest problem I've got! :awesome:
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Sooooo, there's this girl Maddi who when I used to have a MySpace, we talked a lot. I met her because she added me seeing we both lived in Humboldt County, and she thought I was cute. But I didn't really think she was attractive. She never said she actually liked me though, so it didn't matter. Anyway, we talked as friends for a couple months but I deleted my MySpace cuz it was annoying and I spent too much time on it lol. So, then we never talked over summer. But about a month ago, she found my YouTube, and she's showed me her pictures and myspace. And oh my, I never remembered her being this adorable. So like, I say to myself that I can't go crushing on her just yet because pictures usually never show what the person actually looks like. So, with that in mind, I restrained myself for awhile of getting all emotional attached to her.

We always talk about how we have to hang out, because we only lived a mile away, and finally two weeks ago, we decides to go to Arts Alive in Eureka together. I felt kindahh weird about doing that though, because I actually found out she has a boy friend(yay)so what I do is say I'm not allowed to go. So, that night I had to go to my grandma's for dinner, and afterwwards the wierdest coincidence happened. We went to Arts Alive.



So, the whole time I didn't see her, or the two girls and two guys she said she'd be with, which kindah made me sad. So I'm at this art gallery called the Accident Gallery and it was just before I was going to go home, and as I was walking out the door I heard someone call my name, so I look back in the room, and I guess no one called my name so I turn around to walk out and right when i turn around there's liek half a dozen kids looking at me lol... And this gorgeous tall and slender girl with beautiful blue eyes says, "Do I know you??"
I knew it was Maddi. I just kind of stared and she laughed, and then we hugged. She introduced me to Xochitl and Ivy and Elka and Tommy and Lawrence, and then I snapped back and remembered she was happily taken. I asked if I could stay with them, and my parents said I could. I was with them til' about midnight. That night was great.


My question is, WHAT THE HELL do I do in this type of situation. I'd love to be with her, but I don't need to ruin another person's relationship when they're already happy together. I like her a lot, really.. She's liek the coolest person I've ever met. Btw We plan on hanging out over Christmas break a couple times.

(btw sorry if you think some of the info wasn't mandatory, I just felt it needed to be put in)


I thought I was the coolest person you've ever met. <_< Nah, you could tell her how you feel about her and let her think about it. If she breaks up with her bf to be with me you, then good for you.

Ermm...



#410 Nate10

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Posted 20 December 2008 - 08:02 AM

Edited due to embarrassment.

Edited by Nate10, 12 May 2009 - 02:35 AM.


#411 Dmac

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Posted 23 December 2008 - 01:40 PM

I like this girl, She likes me. She's had past experiences by the sounds of things so shes scared of a relationship, Except its not her she's afraid that'll get hurt. It's me, Shes afraid i'll get hurt. She's scared something will happen in her life that'll impact me. I spoke to her, Basically said i'm prepaired to risk anything even if it invovles me risking getting hurt to be with her because it would mean so much. So we'll see what happens from there. No official relationship right now.

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#412 azn

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Posted 23 December 2008 - 02:56 PM

Nate you should probably just hang around until something happens between them. Not necessarily saying to deliberate and fuck things up, when, or if he hurts her to breaking point just be there for her and maybe she can realize you're a better person to be with.

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#413 Nate10

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Posted 21 January 2009 - 05:00 AM

Edited due to embarrassment.

Edited by Nate10, 12 May 2009 - 02:36 AM.


#414 TrialByFire

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Posted 24 February 2009 - 10:08 PM

As some of you will know from reading the topic I made a few days ago, I like this girl who happens to be 14, I am nearly 18, plus her bro is a good mate of mine...

Well I don't need advice so much an opinion...

I asked her out a yesterday and told her to think about it for as long as she needs, do you guys reckon that was a good idea?

I have no problem with people believing what they want, until they think it's right to try and change what I believe.

I'm so happy, I could shit a rainbow!


#415 draftermatt

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Posted 03 December 2009 - 03:59 PM

Mine's going quite well actually.

My wife and I are soon going to be celebrating our 9th anniversary (from when we started dating), been married for over 3 years now.

The topic of wee ones has come up now and then so that's pretty exciting.

Sorry to hear your date was a dud Bear. Hope your next one knocks your socks off.
I'm older than most of you. Shut the hell up and get off my lawn.

#416 Bear

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Posted 03 December 2009 - 04:06 PM

Aw wee ones, when I hope that plan goes well. 9 years, well done.

Well sadly for me I do have a thing for geeky guys, my uni is mainly sports people so I am a bit screwed. I may be transferring next year so fingers crossed for then. An academic uni would be nice not a sports one.

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