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Sherman

Love & Relationships Thread

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Sherman    40

Yeah, I'm not gonna befast to do that. I think she's 14 though.. apparently she's in Drivers ed.. so.. 14.5 or barely 15.... meh. I'm almost 16.. no worries. One year is nothing. Plus I wouldn't've guessed, so yeah.. no worries. I'm still wondering how old you are :P And I don't mean 98, haha.

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Gycu    1
Gycu - You've never really pissed off a woman before, have you? Although plan C does have it's merits....

Nope...Because I`m not really a female magnet ... I`m not a kool guy ...

Edited by Gycu

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MrLlamaLlama    96
Yeah, I'm not gonna befast to do that. I think she's 14 though.. apparently she's in Drivers ed.. so.. 14.5 or barely 15.... meh. I'm almost 16.. no worries. One year is nothing. Plus I wouldn't've guessed, so yeah.. no worries. I'm still wondering how old you are :P And I don't mean 98, haha.

My GF is like a year and 3 mths younger than me.. Which kinsda sucks for 3 months of the year, cos atm i'm 16, and she's 14, and some people (maybe even you) might think that's pretty fucked up. It'll be alot better when she's 15 though, that don't really seem so bad.

QUESTION TIME: How much older is too juch older?

Do you think there's a limit to the age difference between you and your partner?

Discuss.

And gycu. You'll find someone.Someday. Promise :thumbsup:

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I love the age question so I'll answer that first and then I'll answer the general girl thing.

Age is nothing but a number, in MOST cases. I can see a bit of a problem when one person is 60 and the other is 13 but we aren't all pedos.

A lot of people think that a relationship with an age difference wont work because of different interests, etc. and the people that say that are the ones that couldn't choose a partner properly. My husband is 12 years older than I am. My parents are 10 years apart and his parents are 20 years apart. Granted, my parents got divorced because my dad used to be a drinker but it had nothing to do with age, my husbands parents are still together after decades and my husband and I are hitting 5 years in January. He acts like I do and likes the same things I do. Age never was an issue and it means nothing. A relationship works because of the people involved, not because of what age they are. That's why people like Catherine Zeta-Jones and Micheal Douglas are still together after a long time and these stupid young couples close in age aren't. They make it work. They get the stupid age thing brought up but they don't care and they show that age really is just a number and things work out because they make it work themselves. Final though: age is nothing but a number and it has no effect on your relationship because if you really love each other, you both compromise to make the relationship work.

Next, from reading quickly most of the posts here, it seems that a lot of you have the question of whether you should go tell a girl your feelings and ask her out.

You can't make a person like you and go out with you. It's a hard thing too when the girl is your friend because if you tell her your true feelings, it might ruin your friendship. My advice to hang out, see what the girl likes doing and hold back your feelings for a while. The bottom line is, BE HONEST AND STRAIGHT UP WITH HER. If she is really your friend, she wont let your feelings ruin your friendship. Just don't go all out and tell her you want to screw her and shit. Just throw out hints at first. Tell her she is an amazing girl, she's fun, she's cool, anything that sort of hints that you like her but doesn't come straight out yet. If she picks up the signals, go for it. Just sit down with her one day and tell her you hope it doesn't ruin the friendship but you have feelings for her and wonder if she has feelings for you. Just make sure you make her feel comfortable. Tell her you wont get hurt, regardless of what her feelings are for you. You don't want to make her feel pressured. If she tells you she is interested in you, don't go all out and think you are BF/GF right away. Tell her you want to date for a while and see what happens before making that decision of whether you really want her as a GF. People could be different, you just have to date for a while to REALLY get to know them and the way they are. If she turns you down, just tell her that she is a very special friend and her decision wont ruin the friendship and let her know you want her as a friend still.

Basically, it's a catch 22. If you tell her your feelings, she might feel the same way. On the other hand, she might be one of those retarded girls who gets offended and upset (seriously, what kind of girl DOESN'T want guys to like her? I'll never understand why they get upset about it) but if that happens, she really wasn't much of a friend in the first place.

Be honest, don't sugercoat things and go for it. If it was meant to be, it will happen. If it wasn't, you just hold your head high and move on to better things. The key is to be patient. You might like a girl this week but next week your feelings might fade. Don't rush and don't feel bad if it doesn't go your way. It will hurt in the beginning but you'll get over it. There is someone for everyone.

Edited by Jade

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Sherman    40

With age.. it depends. 14 and 16 isn't too bad (That's like a Freshman and Junior dating.. don't know where you're from though) but if you're a Senior and screwing 12 year olds, then yeah... I think that's a problem.

We kind of have this 'stupid love' thing in my family. Anyone who married someone rather older, didn't go over so well. Got beat, bad relationship (partner was a druggy or something) or just didn't like them after a few years. But yeah, my family is seriously messed up, so they're nothing to go by.

((Just a disclaimer, I don't want to get flamed because someone mistook it.... stupid love as in just went with them "just cause" or money or nice cars, promised a better life, etc.)

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MrLlamaLlama    96

Thanks Jade, nice contribution.... And good advice.

And skyline, i'm from UK, the sytem as it stands here, is i'm in 'year 11' of school, and she's in 'year 10'. But school starts at 'year 4' here...wtf?

But yeah, neither of us seem to think it's a problem at all, shame her sister does (she's the same age as me, a little older i think).. so yeah, thanks all, the age questionmis a biggie, but you both sispelled my former worries, whick weren't too big anyway... I won't us the 'L' word, because according to skline, it eats kitties in your sleep, or whatever he said.. lol

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Bear    9

An old friend of mine is 17 and is dating a 28 year old man off the internet, I found that quite creepy espically as this 28 year old had groomed a friend of mine at 16 for sex off the internet. That is when I think big age gaps just dont work and are wrong.

My aunt and uncle however have a 20 year age difference and they are so happy and have been married for about 20 years.

So I think it all depends on the situation.

Jade is right about the gril problems, being honest is the best but just dont jump on her or anything or profress your love, obbessesion and stalkers are not appalling for a girl.

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Sherman    40

@Llamma: Yeah, she's probably just a tad worried with you being the same age as her, just protective over her sister.

I won't us the 'L' word, because according to skyline, it eats kitties in your sleep, or whatever he said.. lol

Unless you're positive when you say it.... you don't. The ninjas will eat your kitties and pirates will steal your house.

edit: And on me... things are going quite well ^_^

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Urbanoutlaw    12

MrLlamaLlama - Or she has feelings for you herself. (just hardcore'n you)

Jade - Full Point! Could not have said it better myself. It also helps to get the point of view from the other end of this,

make it easier to avoid hurt feelings.

The age thing, depends on your age. MrLlamaLlama should be fine as she's within a couple of years of you. If she were 9,

that would be different. Just save the grown-up stuff (& all the headaches that go with it)for when you're older & enjoy being kids. When you're older & get some life experience it becomes a matter of who makes you happy. One of my best friends married a woman almost old enough to be his mother, & we joke about her being his second Mommy, but the marriage works & they're both happy.

28 year old internet guy & senior who wants to date my 12 year old - These guys haven't seen my topic "Show us your guns".

SkyliNe - I've also eluded photography to date. :evil:

Edited by Urbanoutlaw

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MrLlamaLlama    96
MrLlamaLlama - Or she has feelings for you herself. (just hardcore'n you)

Jade - Full Point! Could not have said it better myself. It also helps to get the point of view from the other end of this,

make it easier to avoid hurt feelings.

The age thing, depends on your age. MrLlamaLlama should be fine as she's within a couple of years of you. If she were 9,

that would be different. Just save the grown-up stuff (& all the headaches that go with it)for when you're older & enjoy being kids. When you're older & get some life experience it becomes a matter of who makes you happy. One of my best friends married a woman almost old enough to be his mother, & we joke about her being his second Mommy, but the marriage works & they're both happy.

28 year old internet guy & senior who wants to date my 12 year old - These guys haven't seen my topic "Show us your guns".

SkyliNe - I've also eluded photography to date. :evil:

Yeah, she's been with her boyfreind sam for a year anyways...

Yeah, and we're both fine with the age thing, it's not as if my mental age is too high anyways :gappy: hehe

And i din't meet her on the internet. lolz

kay, sky, i seewher you're coming from, i'll say it positively.

Yeah, so on wednesday, me and jess will have been together 3 months. Not bad, but i've done better. Not that i think it'll end soon or anything... wel, i hope not :wub: hehe

Another Question for y'all: Is arguing (with your partner/significant other) healthy? If not, why not?, if yes.... Why? and how much is too much?

Edited by MrLlamaLlama

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Urbanoutlaw    12

MrLlamaLlama - If we ever need someone to set land mines, you're it! Arguments are okay sometimes, to a point

(let off stress & clear issues) but then people get caught up in the right/wrong issue & then ...problems. I've heard them referred to as a pressure valve.

Also, meant what I said positively. Enjoy being 16 while it lasts, it's supposed to be one of the best times of your life. B)

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Why are sluts... well, sluts? Being made fun of and used all the time doesn't exactly sound appealing..

Females like that have no self respect. They have no morals. To me, they are sad cases (and by that I mean pathetic).

There are different types of sluts really, depending on what definition(s) you use. For example, there is the true meaning of sluts and I personally use slut to describe some people on the internet. I've been to a lot of forums since 2004 and time and time again I see females who post pictures of themselves half naked and shit like that. Seriously, just don't. They do it in VIDEO GAME forums. If you want to do that shit, go to a damn dating forum. Those females are the ones who need to get attention and want to be popular and, since we all know most video game forums are a sausagefest, they post pictures of themselves that they think are sexy but are actually trashy. They don't realize they are making an ass of themself. Of course the guys are going to start drooling, it's obvious because GUYS ARE VISUAL and love the sight of breasts and skin. Doesn't even really matter what the girl's face looks like, as long as breasts and more skin is visable, they'll like it. It isn't their fault, it's just the way guys are made but you'd figure a female would be smart enough to not be a trashy bitch and, for the record, me saying this in no way means that I am jealous. I am incredibly happy with my looks and don't need to post half naked pictures of myself to get noticed.

On the arguing point, if you argue everyday, get out of your relationship because it isn't going to work. Arguing once in a while is healthy because the fact is, not every decision will be agreed upon. Two people that come together are different. They have their own beliefs, opinions, likes, dislikes, there is just no way a couple can agree on every single thing.

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Bear    9

thats exactly right Jade. I have no respect for slutty girls, they just have no self respect or shame. They are just very insecure and want to reassurance to make them feel better about themselves, even though they are just being used.

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MrLlamaLlama    96
thats exactly right Jade. I have no respect for slutty girls, they just have no self respect or shame. They are just very insecure and want to reassurance to make them feel better about themselves, even though they are just being used.

^ out come the claws.... I'd better hide :ph34r:

But urbanoutlaw, i'm always here if you need me :P

I like arguing, don't get me wrong, but i makes me sad when i argue with my GF, she hates losing. And so do i. Most of the time i know its probably best to let her win.... I know i'm a pushover.... :blush:

But it's agreat feeling when you realise what you were arguing about was stupid and trivial...

And gerard... Good point...Good point... :yup:

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7.62mm    0

I am not like most people. I dont get mad. :P Its just not possible. Im never going to argue.

I dont look at girls the way most people do. I see them as people too. I treat them just as I would with any other guy. I have more gf's than guy friends.

Also I dont judge. People call me a wigger. Idc. I dress how I want. I have never smoked in my life. I never have taken a drug, I never had beer, I have never been to a party. I am not popular at all. I see girls as anyone else. Tyhe slutty ones. I should call them.. they just.. Like Jade and Bear said. I agree with you two. If you knew me more I think you would be amazed at how I think ;)

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